If an investigation reveals that your spouse or loved one is indeed cheating, here are some possible steps you need to take:
- Tell your story to a trusted family member or religious person. This is a good opportunity to vent and let off some steam. When you sit down one-on-one with a person you can trust, they can offer some emotional feedback that will help you in your time of need.
- Get legal representation. It’s crucial for you to know your legal rights, and they can assist should you move forward with divorce proceedings.
- If your ultimate goal is to heal your marriage, you have the evidence to confront them. In order for any marriage to work there needs to be trust. If you don’t confront them and make them come clean, it will be unlikely you will ever really trust them again. Be judicious and diplomatic in your approach. State the facts and your intention to resolve matters. But, remember you cannot control someone else’s thoughts, emotions or intentions. It will be up to both of you to decide if reconciliation is worth pursuing. Many couples seek counseling or the advice of a religious figure in this matter.
- Be very careful not to vent to friends that you don’t fully trust, because it might leak out to your spouse or to the general community. You don’t want to air out your dirty laundry and have it haunt you later. This is a very private thing going on your life right now, and if you do have the evidence that your spouse is cheating, it may be best to keep it to yourself for now.
In the past 25 years or more, I’ve seen people work it out, while others go down the road to divorce. This is going to be a decision you’re going to have to make. It’s a tough decision, so take as much time as you need. This is the final segment in our series on domestic infidelity, and this segment is dedicated to you. I hope all is well in your marriage and you really don’t need my services. If I can be of assistance, please don’t hesitate to call. The consultation is always free.